In The Beginning, Marriage

“Marriage is to be held in honor among all.” Hebrews 13:4

The origins of marriage can be found in the first book of Scripture. During the early days of human history, Yahweh established marriage as the creational norm. It is the first institution, created and ordained as the fixed basis, the foundation on which all of society is built. Marriage is a primary means God uses to mature His children and is the institution by which to train the next generation in His Truth.

Marriage is the place of great enjoyment, unlike any other. Marriage is for the benefit of man that produces a stable ordered society. And, marriage is the visible image of the one of a kind relationship Christ has with His people. Marriage then, is special and necessary in God's creational economy. When marriage is honored, God glorified and all of man is blessed.

In The Beginning

From the Genesis record, the fundamental importance of marriage is established. During the first days of creation from all the creatures on the earth, "for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him" (Genesis 2:20). Clearly something was missing, a need that animals cannot fill. The Reformation Study Bible points out, "the word 'helper' entails his inadequacy." Adam in and of himself was not adequate. Why? Because the Author of life said, "It is not good for the man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18). So Yahweh had Adam perform an exercise to teach this specific truth: "Yahweh God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and He brought each to the man to see what he would call [name] it" (Genesis 2:19). Yahweh guided Adam, by providing a practical truth lesson, by demonstrating his inadequacy and the difference between man and animals.

Our Image

People are unique in the creation order: "Then God said, 'Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness, so that they will have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth'" (Genesis 1:26). In other words, animals are different and cannot fulfill what was lacking and God knew this and Adam needed to understand this.

Therefore God said "I will make him a helper suitable for him" (Genesis 2:18). And "Yahweh God fashioned the rib, which He had taken from the man, into a woman, and He brought her to the man" (Genesis 2:22). Immediately upon seeing her, Adam gave her a unique name that no other animal can have, "woman."

Astonishment is likely an understatement. When Adam saw the woman, she indeed was unique in every way: "This one finally is bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh" (Genesis 2:23). Only the woman can fulfill what was lacking. Adam now, is not alone. Only the woman can be and would be "suitable for him."

First Wedding

This part of the creation account unfolds for us the first wedding. The presenting of the woman by Yahweh to to Adam, begins the first marriage ceremony and shows that marriage is the God intended norm for men and women. It is to be a once in a lifetime lifelong joining, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother, and cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).

God visibly demonstrated in this ceremony, the responsibility Adam now has. It is not hard to imagine, Eve walking from along side Yahweh to Adam. Now at his side, Adam became responsible to love, care, provide and protect his wife, a never ending duty. He is to "cleave to his wife." He is to unite with her in all of life, in the most intimate way. So much so, "they shall become one flesh." It is to be a consummate relationship, a unique joining, a relationship that is united and complete to the highest degree.

Creation Complete

They are now one and that oneness began the moment Adam took Eve's hand. Then in Genesis 2:25, the purity and rightness of this relationship is described "And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed." Marriage is marked by a shared openness. The place where nothing is to be withheld or comes between the "man and his wife." In this setting, the woman, the wedding and the man cleaving to his wife, creation was now complete. "And God saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good" (Genesis 1:31).

Creational Norm

In the sight of God, marriage is good. It is the norm. It is right. Therefore, young men and women must prepare for and seek marriage. And, marriage must be encouraged, it must be respected and held in high honor by all. This is the established normal, the natural order for all peoples in God's creation; men and women are to marry. A balanced whole life is intended to be lived with another person.

Singleness is not normal, therefore marriage must not be delayed. A culture that elevates singleness as a virtue and being free from the supposed confines of marriage is wrong. The list of things placed on the young generation that they must do before even thinking about marriage is endless; as if marriage will not allow for education or a career or whatever is deemed more important. These ignore what God says, "it is not good for the man to be alone." Singleness then, is not a blessing.

When?

It can be debated as to what constitutes "marriageable age," how young should people marry. Looking to Genesis, within six days of creation there is a wedding. Early adulthood should be marked with marriage. The creation account closes with this one final achievement; Yahweh brings Eve to Adam in marriage, Adam cleaving to his wife and the two becoming "one flesh."

There is no sense of postponement, rather the normal progression is from childhood into adulthood and marriage. The "man shall leave his father and his mother, and cleave to his wife." The imagery is plain, the boy grows to manhood and leaves his parents to marry a woman. The woman's father gives (cf. Genesis 2:22a), transferring of duties to the man as the woman's husband. The man and his wife are the beginning of a new family.

Honoring Marriage

The church must take a special interest in upholding the institution of marriage and honoring marriages. Instructing from God's Word the particular importance of marriage and why. Parents have the divine responsibility to teach and prepare their young for marriage.

As an institution established by God, it must be understood how marriage is a basic building block of the church and society as a whole. There may be no better gauge today for the spiritual health of a congregation than the health of its marriages.

Husbands and wives hold a precious trust before the Lord and the church. One of our great needs today is the example of strong godly marriages, to encourage those who have never seen true selfless love, by providing them with a visible model. Marriage is an extraordinary witness. Not once, in forty forty years of marriage, has someone expressed to me sorrow or offered a condolence for my experience. Even unbelievers know a life long marriage is good.

Marriage Testimony

This is the place, where the visible image of Jesus Christ's relationship with His people is seen. Marriage then, is one of the greatest Christ honoring testimonies to our culture. Christian couples cleaving to one another, in the sight of all those in the world. Seeing husbands and wives who faithfully meet the struggles of marriage decade after decade, with grace and forgiveness by the power of God.

"Marriage is to be held in honor among all."